Gratitude and issues Revised*

This post was originally posted on Wednesday evening and then taken off because I felt a little too exposed but upon thinking it over I decided to post it.
I honestly don't much like Thanksgiving. It isn't that I am not thankful, I am. It is just that as a kid I remember thinking that the Native Americans got the shaft. As an adult I usually have to work the day before and/or the day after. It makes it difficult for me to really get into a festive state of mind. The mass consumption of food that goes on would mean more to me I think, if food were treated with more respect. Our culture has some SERIOUS issues with food. Oh, and while I am at I get so angry when I hear about people "turkey bowling" WTF is up with that? If people are going to eat flesh, I can't stop them, but for a turkey to live in typical poultry farm conditions and then to be slaughtered only to have it's frozen carcass hurled down a bowling alley or wherever this inane activity takes place is just WRONG people. I don't care why people do it.
In a previous post I commented on the reality of holidays with my family. I don't mind really. (*Actually had a great day with family for the most part.) It is just the way we work or don't work together. OK so I am getting to the gratitude portion of this post. Really.
For a variety of reasons the last few years have been really hard for me. This year was the hardest. I am a glass half empty person by nature and I don't always rise above that though I try. I thought a lot about ending everything more than once. My friend Karen, just by being her wise woman self helped more than she knows during some rough times. Another is a person that I have only met online Angelina helped so much by laying bare her own thoughts and struggles in such an eloquent way usually at exactly the right time. I think she must be psychic. I am so grateful for both of these women. I guess in light of tomorrow and all the thanks that will be said I would like to thank them and the other kind people who have left comments on my blog, especially Lisa and Natalie. I am often in a dark space in my head and just seeing that I have a comment on a post can make it a tiny bit brighter. I am feeling a lot of sadness at this time. Some family issues that I can't really go into and some personal, I am trying to not get mired down while still dealing with my life. I am grateful for my friends and family that have stuck with me even though I haven't been the easiest to be around. Thanks.
So just to recap, Say NO to turkey bowling. It is wrong. Thanks to all who read and leave messages. *Hope you had a Happy Thanksgiving.